The heat of working outside was getting to me. A bead of sweat rippled down my temple, continue past my right cheek to my jaw, where it rested a few seconds before falling to the cracked hard desert soil. I reached for the can...
...died yams. I LOVE candied yams, especially on a hot day like this. I carry them with me in a paper sack, so the juice soaks through and I can smell it as I walk around all day. I was on a hunt to shoot bears... not to kill them, but to shoot them with my camera.
Bears in the dessert? Are you crazy? That's what you're probably thinking, isn't it? But these are sand bears. The legendary sand bears, seemingly more mythical than the chupa cabra or the sasquatch, but I have seen them crush down the door of their sand caves, where they are hidden from human view. I will be the first person in human history to have get one on film.
So rare that I've only heard of them once. Some guys in my third period English class told me about them some time ago. So now, finally, here I am, camped out in the desert with my video camera and my gigantic paper bag full of candied yams. By morning of the second day, I had completely run out of candied yams. By the middle of the third day, and still no sand bears to be seen, I was desperate for food. I searched the area for something edible and found several plants, which I gathered and placed in my yam-soaked paper sack. I tried one; it was horribly bitter and painfully prickly. The second plant was almost as indedible. The third was barely tolerable and the fourth was almost palettable, but there was so little of it, I could hardly make a meal of it. I ate all of the fouth plant, then started on the third, barely tolerable plant. After my meager meal, I gaze was drawn to a large tumbleweed plant in the distance. I was certain it had been there the entire time I had been posted, but I was sure just then that it moved! I watched it for a while longer. It HAD moved! Then it rose to it’s feet! A sand bear! I’d finally spotted one! I jumped to my feet, ready to run for my camera, but found myself feeling a dizzy and disoriented. I guess it was the high temperature because the cactus to my left melted in the desert heat. I had no idea that cacti could melt. I guess you learn something new every day. I struggled to regain my bearings as I staggered toward my camera bag. I fell to my knees and reached into my bag, then I pulled out my camera and began shooting. I had finally found the mythical sand bear and would now be the first person in history to film it in its natural habitat!
The last time I had seen a sand bear, I was in a similar circumstance, minus the camera I saw what appeared to be a strange, solid mound with no visible openings. I had been hunting wolverines at the time, with my 12 gauge, of course. As I fired and missed, a wolverine got too close to the mound and paid the gruesome price! The sand bear had crushed down an opening in his mound and grabbed the wolverine in its powerful jaws.
Over time, the manila colored caniform, devoured the poor thing and then, after resting a while, began rebuilding the wall of its mound! It went about doing so by scooping up sand in its mouth, apparently mixing it with its saliva and vomiting the mixture out, gradually piling up the gooey mixture to cover the cave door. Sand bears are amazing!
Actually, I didn't actually _see_ this, but that was the amazing story I was told by those kids in my class. Thankfully, I was now seeing the sand bear with my very own eyes!
Now this miracle of nature was unfolding before my eyes! The elusive and magnificent sand bear stood before me as I watched while it began shoveling great paws full of sand into its mouth. I stared in awe as it mixed the sand with its saliva, and then spit it back into its paws where it skillfully and deftly molded it into what would be its shelter from this sweltering heat which was intense enough to melt a cactus!
Speaking of heat. I suddenly realized how parched I was. I had a water bottle which, after drinking the last of the water, I'd filled by squeazing the juice from my gigantic yam-soaked paper sack and saved it for just such an emergency. I didnt want to miss a second of footage of the magnificent sand bear so, holding the camera with one hand, I began twisting the top off of my yam juice. It is no easy task untwisting the lid off of a bottle with one hand. Finally I got the lid off and tossed it aside; but as I reached for the bottle while trying to balance the camera, I accidentally knocked the bottle over, spilling the precious yam juice into the sand!
I watched in despair as my precious yam juice soaked into the sand. The sudden realization that I now had nothing to drink made me more acutely aware of my growing thirst. Each swallow became more and more painful each time. My throat kept sticking shut and felt like it was cracking. Despite my desperation and my urgent need to quench my thirst, my determination to catch the sand bear on video was greater. I continued filming through my desolation; and as I watched, I was suddenly struck with a flash of inspiration by the sand bear! While I continued shooting, I scooped up a handful of yam juice soaked sand and shoveled it into my mouth. Frantically, I sucked the yam juice from the sand in an attempt to quench my parched throat. One handful after another, I sucked the juice from the sand, spitting the spent sand on the ground. It worked! The sand bear had saved my life!
As I watched the sand bear and emulated it simultaneously by shoveling sand into my mouth with my paws, I felt myself losing a degree of consciousness. Perhaps the lack of food, despite the yam juice, was catching up with me. I lost track of the sand bear in my disorientation momentarily, only to spot it at the corner of my eye. I fought off the oncoming delirium as I followed the sand bear's movement... always at the corner of my eye. Where did he go? There he is... at the corner of my eye. Something isn't right here. I fell forward into the sand.
In my dream, I was inside a sand mound. I felt my huge furry body breathing in and out and accutely felt any tiny movement that occurred outside my mound. The wind blowing, a bird hopping a bug buzzing by, I was aware of it.
In my dream, I could feel the vibrations of something larger approaching. My mouth watered and my heart beat faster as it drew nearer and nearer. It was only a few yards away now, and I readied myself to plow through my mound to devour whatever it was. I did so, and smothered my prey with my mouth and paws, a delicious, wild candied yam! I ate it voraciously, licking my lips and savouring every juicy bite. No paper sack for me! No sir! A candied yam eating alpha predator, I am!
then I spread my arms and flapped as hard as I could. I rose high up into the air. Looking down, I spotted a vast herd of wild yams, running free through the desert.. or 'dessert' might be more appropriate in this instance. I swooped down upon them and grasped a gigantic, fat yam in my talons, glided back down to my sand-dome and feasted upon the succulent tuber. What a wonderful dream. Disappointingly, when I awoke many hours later, the sand bear was gone. It was dark and I was alone.
I wandered back to my car, which was parked only about thirty yards away. I opened my trunk and placed my sand-covered video camera next to the cooler... wait. I had completely forgotten about my cooler! Inside were a great deal of melted ice and a few cans of Dr. Pepper! Well, I guess the sand bear actually save my life, but this trip was all worth it for sure. The important thing is that my video camera was intact and I remembered to take the lens cover off during the video taping. Wait...
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! now no one would believe that I had actually witnessed a real live sand bear! My trip had all been in vain... almost... at least I would know. I had witnessed the sand bear in all it's majesty.. and I was determined that I would return again. I would find the sand bear; and next time, I would remember to take the lense cap off. I reached into my cooler, fished around in the still-freezing water and grabbed a soda, then I opened the ice cold can of Dr. Pepper and drank deeply. It was much more refreshing than sucking yam juice out of a mouthful of sand.
...died yams. I LOVE candied yams, especially on a hot day like this. I carry them with me in a paper sack, so the juice soaks through and I can smell it as I walk around all day. I was on a hunt to shoot bears... not to kill them, but to shoot them with my camera.
ReplyDeleteBears in the dessert? Are you crazy? That's what you're probably thinking, isn't it? But these are sand bears. The legendary sand bears, seemingly more mythical than the chupa cabra or the sasquatch, but I have seen them crush down the door of their sand caves, where they are hidden from human view. I will be the first person in human history to have get one on film.
So rare that I've only heard of them once. Some guys in my third period English class told me about them some time ago. So now, finally, here I am, camped out in the desert with my video camera and my gigantic paper bag full of candied yams.
ReplyDeleteBy morning of the second day, I had completely run out of candied yams. By the middle of the third day, and still no sand bears to be seen, I was desperate for food. I searched the area for something edible and found several plants, which I gathered and placed in my yam-soaked paper sack. I tried one; it was horribly bitter and painfully prickly. The second plant was almost as indedible. The third was barely tolerable and the fourth was almost palettable, but there was so little of it, I could hardly make a meal of it. I ate all of the fouth plant, then started on the third, barely tolerable plant.
After my meager meal, I gaze was drawn to a large tumbleweed plant in the distance. I was certain it had been there the entire time I had been posted, but I was sure just then that it moved! I watched it for a while longer. It HAD moved! Then it rose to it’s feet! A sand bear! I’d finally spotted one!
I jumped to my feet, ready to run for my camera, but found myself feeling a dizzy and disoriented. I guess it was the high temperature because the cactus to my left melted in the desert heat. I had no idea that cacti could melt. I guess you learn something new every day.
I struggled to regain my bearings as I staggered toward my camera bag. I fell to my knees and reached into my bag, then I pulled out my camera and began shooting. I had finally found the mythical sand bear and would now be the first person in history to film it in its natural habitat!
The last time I had seen a sand bear, I was in a similar circumstance, minus the camera I saw what appeared to be a strange, solid mound with no visible openings. I had been hunting wolverines at the time, with my 12 gauge, of course. As I fired and missed, a wolverine got too close to the mound and paid the gruesome price! The sand bear had crushed down an opening in his mound and grabbed the wolverine in its powerful jaws.
ReplyDeleteOver time, the manila colored caniform, devoured the poor thing and then, after resting a while, began rebuilding the wall of its mound! It went about doing so by scooping up sand in its mouth, apparently mixing it with its saliva and vomiting the mixture out, gradually piling up the gooey mixture to cover the cave door. Sand bears are amazing!
Actually, I didn't actually _see_ this, but that was the amazing story I was told by those kids in my class. Thankfully, I was now seeing the sand bear with my very own eyes!
Now this miracle of nature was unfolding before my eyes! The elusive and magnificent sand bear stood before me as I watched while it began shoveling great paws full of sand into its mouth. I stared in awe as it mixed the sand with its saliva, and then spit it back into its paws where it skillfully and deftly molded it into what would be its shelter from this sweltering heat which was intense enough to melt a cactus!
ReplyDeleteSpeaking of heat. I suddenly realized how parched I was. I had a water bottle which, after drinking the last of the water, I'd filled by squeazing the juice from my gigantic yam-soaked paper sack and saved it for just such an emergency.
ReplyDeleteI didnt want to miss a second of footage of the magnificent sand bear so, holding the camera with one hand, I began twisting the top off of my yam juice. It is no easy task untwisting the lid off of a bottle with one hand. Finally I got the lid off and tossed it aside; but as I reached for the bottle while trying to balance the camera, I accidentally knocked the bottle over, spilling the precious yam juice into the sand!
I watched in despair as my precious yam juice soaked into the sand. The sudden realization that I now had nothing to drink made me more acutely aware of my growing thirst. Each swallow became more and more painful each time. My throat kept sticking shut and felt like it was cracking. Despite my desperation and my urgent need to quench my thirst, my determination to catch the sand bear on video was greater. I continued filming through my desolation; and as I watched, I was suddenly struck with a flash of inspiration by the sand bear! While I continued shooting, I scooped up a handful of yam juice soaked sand and shoveled it into my mouth. Frantically, I sucked the yam juice from the sand in an attempt to quench my parched throat. One handful after another, I sucked the juice from the sand, spitting the spent sand on the ground. It worked! The sand bear had saved my life!
ReplyDeleteAs I watched the sand bear and emulated it simultaneously by shoveling sand into my mouth with my paws, I felt myself losing a degree of consciousness. Perhaps the lack of food, despite the yam juice, was catching up with me. I lost track of the sand bear in my disorientation momentarily, only to spot it at the corner of my eye. I fought off the oncoming delirium as I followed the sand bear's movement... always at the corner of my eye. Where did he go? There he is... at the corner of my eye. Something isn't right here. I fell forward into the sand.
ReplyDeleteIn my dream, I was inside a sand mound. I felt my huge furry body breathing in and out and accutely felt any tiny movement that occurred outside my mound. The wind blowing, a bird hopping a bug buzzing by, I was aware of it.
In my dream, I could feel the vibrations of something larger approaching. My mouth watered and my heart beat faster as it drew nearer and nearer. It was only a few yards away now, and I readied myself to plow through my mound to devour whatever it was. I did so, and smothered my prey with my mouth and paws, a delicious, wild candied yam! I ate it voraciously, licking my lips and savouring every juicy bite. No paper sack for me! No sir! A candied yam eating alpha predator, I am!
then I spread my arms and flapped as hard as I could. I rose high up into the air. Looking down, I spotted a vast herd of wild yams, running free through the desert.. or 'dessert' might be more appropriate in this instance. I swooped down upon them and grasped a gigantic, fat yam in my talons, glided back down to my sand-dome and feasted upon the succulent tuber.
ReplyDeleteWhat a wonderful dream.
Disappointingly, when I awoke many hours later, the sand bear was gone. It was dark and I was alone.
I wandered back to my car, which was parked only about thirty yards away. I opened my trunk and placed my sand-covered video camera next to the cooler... wait. I had completely forgotten about my cooler! Inside were a great deal of melted ice and a few cans of Dr. Pepper! Well, I guess the sand bear actually save my life, but this trip was all worth it for sure. The important thing is that my video camera was intact and I remembered to take the lens cover off during the video taping. Wait...
ReplyDeleteNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! now no one would believe that I had actually witnessed a real live sand bear! My trip had all been in vain... almost... at least I would know. I had witnessed the sand bear in all it's majesty.. and I was determined that I would return again. I would find the sand bear; and next time, I would remember to take the lense cap off.
ReplyDeleteI reached into my cooler, fished around in the still-freezing water and grabbed a soda, then I opened the ice cold can of Dr. Pepper and drank deeply. It was much more refreshing than sucking yam juice out of a mouthful of sand.